Posts Tagged ‘baby’
helpless
I sat in our Advent service today, my eyes a bit glazy from the days before. In a week of new sites, sounds and people in Jude’s life, he required more of my care and attention to balance out the increased stimulation. It once again made me keenly aware of his deep dependence on me. Not just for food and shelter, but for compassion and energy, gentleness and peace.
As I held a sleeping Jude next to my heart, I glanced over the hymnal again and again to be sure I was reading the words right. The helpless babe… was what the Christmastime hymn had to say about Jesus.
Helpless.
Jesus.
Really?
I looked down at Jude and thought about how helpless he is. As it stands, he is utterly dependent on the care and kindness of someone else (namely, me) for every necessity. It’s hard to imagine Jesus in the same position as an infant. I mean, think of it – the being who spoke universes and mountains into existence incapable of lifting his head without Mary’s hand behind it.
Seems that Jesus gave more than we sometimes remember. Not just in coming to save his creation, but in entrusting his strong and holy self to the likes of a teenage mother and her betrothed. It says something about Christ. It says something about us, too. That somehow he believes we weak and frail beings are worthy of holding divinity in our hands and tending to his every need.
1 Commentschool of jude: lessons #503 & #519
Maybe I’m amazed at the way you help me sing my song,
right me when I’m wrong,
Maybe I’m amazed at the way I really need you.
Paul McCartney, Maybe I’m Amazed
…weak flesh, that least-suspected place, where health and growth will be revealed.
Richard Rohr, Radical Grace
Lesson #503: My husband is far more amazing than I have ever given him credit for.
Lesson #519: I am desperately weak and hopelessly dependent – so much more than I could have possibly imagined.
No Commentsschool of jude: lessons #59 and #81
Can’t you see, it’s amazing what you do to me. You took my heart and made me feel things I never felt before. And it’s changing me. I lose direction so suddenly. Shook me up and threw me around and helped me learn to breathe it all in. You help me learn to breathe it all in.
- Mindy Smith, It’s Amazing
Lesson #59: Parenthood is not for perfectionists. It is for the un-made-up, un-showered, un-slept who are just fool enough to keep trying, keep fouling it up, and keep loving.
Lesson #81: You can love someone to the stars and back again, love them with every breath in you, love them more than your own life, and still not know what they need when they cry.
2 Commentsever growing
I caught a glimpse of myself – my 24-weeks-pregnant self – in the mirror this morning while getting ready. And I started crying.
Because it is beautiful.
The curves.
The ever-growing bulge.
The soft cocoon that is housing my most precious gift.
It is beautiful, this place where he lives and breathes, where his heart beats and legs kick.
Yes, I love my pregnant belly. How could I not love this place that is home and haven to my sweet baby?
2 Commentshey jude: a letter from your momma
[click the picture to see Jude's first video]
Well, Jude, I suppose you’re not surprised. But your momma certainly is. Surprised and filled with unspeakable joy. She thought the little life inside was for sure a girl, but when you uncrossed those growing legs at the ultrasound appointment today, you let us in on your secret.
Oh my God, a boy! was all I could say as the technician typed, “BOY” in all caps across the screen. And your daddy was speechless. We cried and laughed and cried and laughed some more while we held hands and learned about your spine, your kidneys, your heart, your feet, your face. That sweet face. From the grainy images on the screen it looks like you have your momma’s nose and your daddy’s mouth.
I went right out and bought you a book today, a real boy book. You already have so many books from all of us here waiting for you. (We think you might love to read like momma and daddy.) But none of those books were just for a boy, so I took care of that. I can’t wait to hold you in my lap and read you to sleep. And read you to dream-worlds and fantasy-lands only a boy with your imagination could create.
I have talked to God about you, talked all about you so many mornings, afternoons, evenings and in the deep mid-nights when sleep wouldn’t have me. I loved you before I even knew you existed. And now, as you are daily shaped into the boy who is my son, I pray this blessing over you:
Jude Adam
May you know courage and tenderness, strength and compassion.
May you worship God from dust to dust, all your days.
May you receive the life-giving inheritance of grace that is yours because you are huios, a son and an heir.
May you always know your name, Child; the name given you by the One who has forever known you.And “may mercy and peace and love be multiplied to you…and may you keep yourself in the love of God, ready and waiting for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ to eternal life. May you have mercy on some who are doubting; and save others, snatching them out of the fire…” (Jude 2, 21-23)
You are a treasured gift, Jude Adam. You are a blessed son.
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